Different pathway~

I do had a second thought. Not once, but many times. I told myself that life ain't as fair as it should be.

Life is hard. Tough. Only those who is strong enough can survive. I've been through a lot. Too much, non stop. And to be honest, this isn't the kind of life I've dreamed of.

I wanted it to be simpler, easier, and clearer. Get my medical grades, get a job, work my ass off to the best, find my true love, get married, and focus on being a good wife and mom, and a great doctor. Ease enough.

But Allah had granted me a far much different pathway. Completely different. Too much painful and tiresome obstacles. Why me? Maybe I'm one of those strong candidates that seem stronger enough to break the hardest wall. But to be honest, I am not strong. I'm weak, fragile. Easily gave up.

But who am I to questioned Allah's plan? For sure He knew what's best for me. Maybe this is the moment, where I need to bounce myself back up after the hardest fall. All I need to do is just turn myself into the right material. To bounce higher then other's expectations.

I need to be stronger. I need to practice bigger patience. And most important, I need to stop comparing my life with others. Seeing their perfectly happy life, makes me hate my life even more. Regrets and questions. Too much and adding an extra burden over my chest. Maybe, they already had those painful and hard moment in their life. And they've got through it successfully. So now it's their time to savour the sweetness of their life.

My time will come. I strongly believed it will. Sooner. Just be stronger, patient, and have faith. Allah always watching. Just have faith. Life might seem not fair enough, but who know this path was made to create a better version of me. I hope.

Heart, keep calm. Just move on. I chose to stay on this road, this pathway. I do saw some other better options, but I choose to stay here. I believe, it will bring me to a better life forward. All I need to do is just keep moving forward, no more turning back, no more regrets and hesitation. Just move on.

Don't underestimate others life. Everyone had their toughest moment. The difference is, how they able to get through it.

Life is hard. I know..